I had long since known how I had met my losses, through my twelfth house cusp and how it’s ruler was posited in my third house (of Mercury).
People had died in cars, dad for one, that one through suicide, very twelfth.
It was in the local neighbourhood, the garage to be exact and in my early education we (me and my gem sis) were stigmatised and talked about, so yeah I get the connection. I thought a couple of days ago I would do a wordplay on everything the cusp in Libra could bring me in terms of trouble. What I didn’t expect was to be able to see not only many issues in this, my present life, I could also see shadows, twelfth, of my late fathers life, but even more shockingly there was my past life..one I had uncovered over the past eight years and wrote about in my book, Just a mother of four.

I had met, me, before and knew a lot of detail which had noted and written about, what I had not found out till today was exactly what “karma” I was getting in this, life, in my existence as Kat and where it came from in terms of what I, as Bella (my late great gran on fathers side) had left outstanding. Brace yourself..here we go..with the ruler of the twelfth cusp in the third, losses relate to cars, the mind, being anxious, restless, local travel, the neighbourhood, selling, commerce, communicating, speech, being misunderstood, not heard, not listened to, not being seen, having no say, having my needs given less importance to the other person (the man btw) within the partnership.. Issues to do with inequality – with siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles, favourites and not favourites. Self / others being out of balance-Libra twelfth. Issues to do with partnerships and relating with sibs etc ..communication problems and misunderstandings with the above. Losses to do with early education, not learning, keeping moving, being a gypsy or a wanderer. Learning and education were a problem, being “ thick”, the local neighbourhood kept moving…houses maybe..the sibs kept moving and aunts and uncles were lost..twelfth house, partnership-libra – lost- education was lost- not learning to read and write- mercury- not able to express myself as had no way to reach others verbally. Feeling restless- Mercury as wired due to no self expression. Movement, losses of movement, neighbours losses or trouble with them, them not hearing me, accommodating my needs, them putting their needs above my needs, boundaries being breached, as mercury on I c..it’s the garage..as the home is fourth the i c is the symbolic edge. The boundary.
Threats, losses, trouble with neighbours, the neighbourhood.
Having to negotiate..Libra..with neighbours (yes tell me about it, in this life, my neighbours vicious dog attacked my dog, and previously had gone for me whilst on my own property) hubby threatened him with the law- that’s Libra) -he’s using my chart lol- issues over cars. Yeah same neighbour parking on our drive…wtf!! transport or movement, ideas, cars ,bikes, motorcycles, comms, computers, messages. Falling out with sibs over cars, movement, neighbours, aunts or over gossip, speech, comms, writing (my book lol) Sharing ideas- networking, Mercury-locally-in neighbourhood could bring disharmony-Libra- and trouble.(law)- it did, after the dog incident the police were involved. I had felt we were not safe. It’s all about keeping my mouth shut, keeping the peace at any cost and not being seen or heard, being stealthy. Learning or not learning how to play the game. Not upsetting the status quo with siblings, aunts, cousins, nephews, nieces…being Libra…peaceful…with that regard..gossip third house brought losses and trouble to sibs, aunts etc an neighbours..it was about my movements...I had been a prostitute..that was in a past life, she was the great gran Bella, the one I’m now channelling. I’m re doing that life, as at soul level we are the same, this life’s a re run…these details I’m getting off this twelfth house cusp is not just me, now, it’s me ,back then in 1900 in Brighton as a lady of  the night. Venus is ruler of the Libra on the twelfth. Losses..12 th..were about how I valued myself, how I valued my body, my self esteem, I had lost it if I ever had it..it was due to inequality, favouritism, Libra being out of balance. Never learnt how to relate within sib relationships..third house Mercurys house, could not share, was more Aries than Libra…Yes.. was selfish .OMG. She, Bella had been an Aries, I pulled up her chart..What I saw blew me away- her birthday is TODAY- it was the 9th of April 1876. WTFFF..

Losses twelfth in love – Venus-losses within love relationships, not able to be a partner due to my relating issues- my movement- my infidelity- yes for sure. My values – Venus the ruler- retrograde btw- were out of kilter- Libra- with what peaceful partnerships required. My commerce, Mercury, third house, the selling of my body, was more important than my marriage or my reputation which greatly upset my sibs, aunts, cousins and neighbours and my partner. My mouth- communication- more mercury was foul- not Libra- peaceful and harmonious- my movements within the third house with my Venus- beautiful body- was much source of acrimony and gossip- mercury.

My Venus peregrine and retrograde my Mars peregrine..my family cast me out, and my sibs same.. is this my dads chart or mine….same happened to him, he was cast out, no contact to a sibling, (half brother)or any of his aunts or uncles .Not able to read or write due to eviction and moving school many times. I had at least been educated, in this life.. Losses of the senses..Venus, senses, not seen or heard for sure but also losses of my morals, having no morals, loose morals, no scruples, Mercury is a thief or can be..its back to dad spin off..it’s losses or incarceration ,12th house in mercurys house, it’s about thieving of a car, he didn’t of course (but the allegation broke his mental health) it was a 12 th house issue- he was confused- as he was drugged- more 12th- my first boyfriend accused of stealing a motorbike so yes more mercury- he was acquitted- like dad would have been had he not took his own life. He, the ex always borrowed his older brothers motorcycle, not insured, well only if he used his name which he did- his older brother favoured btw- he was in the navy- 12 th house, a sailor, whereas my ex in prison. We matched lol, Dad drugged, anti depressants, whereas his dad an alcoholic.

Trouble – 12 th house because of lovers, my choices, my wants and needs, what I wanted I certainly did not need. My Venus desires could not be met because I sabotaged myself– twelfth house- I was lost- my mind- Mercury’s house lost. I had become deluded- twelfth house with / by my choice of partner– my Venus had deluded me- it was my self undoing- twelfth house– I would do anything for them- even sell my body. Nothing was too much, Libra on twelfth, out of kilter, it was all to save them- twelfth. My Venus, desires, were not in alignment with my siblings, aunts expectations. I gave myself away, was too cheap- did a lot of selling- Mercury, of my Venus- body- for too little- Venus money- I valued my services- commerce, Mercury too little. And lastly, the Venus (my body) its in Capricorn, I worked it- cappy very hard for a pittance- cappy is mean. “Others”- back to libra on twelfth were mean, my business, was in body work- Venus is the body. I was my own authority in 12th house matters, secretive btw, but was Saturn involved? Was hubby driving me. Who was Saturn? The work, cappy was cold, I was undervalued, used, taken for granted and treated with contempt. Losses – twelfth made my mind, Mercury third, depressive- cappy, and anxious- Gemini due to Venus, my body, my self worth and not being valued. I had not been heard, listened to within my early sibling relationships. It’s been just the same this time around but now I know why.
Thank you Bella, as we are connected through my higher self and I salute you for your lively insight and the many years you have guided me from within my cells, tissues and mind ensuring that I / you paid back every last drop of karma that “we” owed.